If I have a terrible idea, or am over complicating things, just tell me. And tell me why, and maybe I’ll see it your way, or maybe I’ll convince you the complexity is essential, but we’ll be better for it either way.

If you find yourself having to talk like this all the time at work I recommend reading "An Elegant Puzzle" by Will Larson.

PS: here's the direct link to the website: https://howtoprofessionallysay.akashrajpurohit.com/

I really don't understand why people can't be spoken to directly, only in the workplace.

Trying to dance around people's egos is so childish.

"As per my prediction, this outcome does not come as a surprise."

Might as well say "go fuck yourself, eat shit, I was right"

Tbh I don't think the worst problem here is with stating something is overcomplicated but the directness and variously pointed use of 'you'. People will naturally be more defensive.

Many of the example statements involve this use of 'you' in the same fashion. 'Did you even read my email?', 'If you would have read the whole email you’d know the answer to this'. It's a deliberate use of 'you' like an intensifier.

With minor rephrasing these could just be expressed more passively, for scenarios where one doesn't want an almost completely euphemistic tone.

Don’t use comments in this thread as a benchmark on what people expect from you in the office.

One wrong phrase, at a wrong time, with a wrong person can lead to quite bad consequences.

I like how professional is written in quotes.

  {
    "id": 1,
    "question": "You are overcomplicating this",
    "answer": "Being mindful of timelines. Let’s concentrate on the initial scope.",
    "alternativeAnswers": []
  },
  {
    "id": 2,
    "question": "That meeting sounds like a waste of my time",
    "answer": "I’m unable to add value to this meeting but I would be happy to review the minutes.",
    "alternativeAnswers": []
  },

> You’ll see if you read the comments here that some people are like “the alternatives are bullshit corporate speak and infuriate me”, and some are like “yes, at last, a way to help people be more polite / better communicators”. There’s a smattering of “this is passive aggressive” thrown in.

> One of the broad pitches PDI at work types make is that the lower the PDI, the more direct communications are preferred; the higher, the more ‘diplomatic’ the communications are preferred. My vibe on your list is that it’s just a tad more diplomatic than Silicon Valley wants to be, hence the slight negative ‘passive aggressive’ reactions.

> Some of the lowest PDI countries in the world are Israel, and many Northern European countries, and it fits my experience that in those places additional respect is given for bluntness - as Jan Maas in Ted Lasso says “I’m not rude, I’m Dutch.” As a broad stereotype using the alternate wordings you give would be a sign you are not someone to be respected in that environment.

* https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=31224996#unv_31226119

For example the website suggest this “translation”: “Do your job!” -> “ It is my understanding that you are the appropriate person to contact in regards to this. But if there’s is someone better equipped for this let me know.”

Now the problem here is that i routinely send the second and it means what it says. It doesn’t mean what it purports to “translate from”. What it means when i send the second is that the process and the responsibility is unclear. I want my request to be dealt with, but if due to the above mentioned vagueness I found the wrong person to ask I want to be told. The alternative being that i found the wrong person/process and they either silently ignore my request because it is not their problem, or get mad that now they have a new responsibility seemingly dumped on them.

I would not use such language if I know-know that it is your job to help me. For example if my laptop dies I go to IT and ask for their help. That is such a clear cut responsibility that I don’t need to cushion the request. But if I need help with something which rarely comes up, or something where it is not immediately obvious who is responsible then I will add that line. For example if I need someone to register a subdomain for me for the first time in forever that could be IT, or Infra, or Networking. So i would just pick whoever i suspect is the best fit, send a message with my request and end it with some variant of “if you are not the right person please redirect me”. If they read that and think based on this website that I’m just saying “Do your job!” that would confuse the issue and cause friction.

Many of the changes are active voice to passive voice. It might sound more polite, but in reality comes off as sneering or condescending.

For e.g., if I've already told you something, I usually change communication channels to a more casual one (pick up the phone, pop my head up, walk over, go on a chat channel) and say: "hey, that question you had, it's already addressed in my email, see this bit over here...".

I would not, as the website suggests, say any of this:

- "There seems to be a disconnect here as this information has already been provided."

- "The information has not changed since the last time it was communicated."

- "As indicated prior."

If you did this to me, I would think you are a jerk.

“I’d encourage everyone to read the full article …” = “did you even read the article?”

“I guess I’m the opposite” = “you’re wrong and I wish I could downvote you to hell”

I miss ngate

As a gen-x’er, I find myself having to navigate these waters often as directness is likened to being unnecessarily aggressive, rude, inappropriate, etc.

I would never speak like this and would quickly disabuse others using this style of speech. You’ll do more harm trying to be saccharine than just saying what you mean in an appropriate tone.

Somebody wasted a significant amount of their time on this slop.

be direct and clear without accusing or putting your emotional baggage in the conversation.

there are no shortcuts or maps that can take you out from the communication maze. know how to be adult & communicate and find your way.

It's not just professionalism. It's the challenge of removing irritation from one's communications because that generally doesn't get the best cooperation.